


Lay Down Your Sword and Shield

by Pandir



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Dark Side of Dimensions Spoiler, I have a lot of emotions about the ending, M/M, and about these two idiots and how their souls are tied together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-31
Updated: 2017-03-31
Packaged: 2018-10-10 05:58:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10430667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pandir/pseuds/Pandir
Summary: to the place where faraway souls can intersect, guide himA fic on the ending of DSOD and the theme of closure.





	1. Searching.

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [Lay Down Your Sword and Shield](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11215758) by [nikolaschika](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikolaschika/pseuds/nikolaschika)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seto will never be able to let go. In fact, he refuses to.

I.

“So, you’ve come for me again, Kaiba?”  
  
There was more behind that simple observation, and Seto almost believed to hear astonishment in his tone. Then again, he was anything Seto wanted him to be, if it wasn’t for this one crucial flaw - he remained just a construct of Seto's own mind, an elaborate hallucination.   
  
Seto had not come to duel, not after the disappointing results of their last one. But the puzzle was not yet complete, and this was all he had to ease his burning desire. There was not much else Seto could do to fill the void, however. Dueling against his creation had turned out to be a waste of time, but Seto’s mind had only so much to offer when it came to connecting to someone else.

What should he do, if not fight him, challenge him? Talk?

He did not want to _talk._ He had no words to convey the turmoil inside of him, and there was nothing that his own hallucination could possibly say to soothe it. It was Yugi who had approached him then, as always drawn to his uncertainty, and with an unnerving ease, he had reached up to cup his cheek, a strange smile on his lips.

Seto did not know what to make of it, even though he was the one controlling all that happened here, so he remained frozen in place as the other Yugi’s fingers ghosted over his jawline. The Solid Vision system was wired with Seto’s brain to emulate the sensations, like that of warm finger tips on his skin, in a way that would feel perfectly real, but even though Seto could feel it, there was something off. It was like an echo, unreal and distant.  
  
He should have expected as much. There were the limits of his own imagination, even though it might seem like his creation acted on his own volition. Still, somehow, Seto was sure this should have done something to him, anything, but he felt nothing. Maybe this kind of contact was indeed overrated. He did not require any tenderness, and certainly nothing as childish as physical comfort. All he knew and all he needed was the heat of battle, nothing less.  
  
“Kaiba”, Yugi said again, softer this time, and it made Seto's stomach churn. Then, suddenly, there was Yugi’s hand on Seto’s throat, his thumb pressing into Seto’s adam's apple and Seto swallowed under the pressure, unmoving, his eyes still meeting Yugi’s relentless gaze.

“Why are you doing this to yourself?”  
  
It was then that Seto realized that there was pity in Yugi’s smile, and he knew what Yugi was about to say before the words came out. That broke the spell, and Seto instantly withdrew.

“Shut up!”, he yelled, his voice ringing in the large, empty room, and as he lashed out, his hand passed right through the dissolving hologram, his outburst effectively ending the simulation.

  

II.

Seto did barely sleep at all, his eyes fixed on the incomplete puzzle, his craving so strong he was sure that it had to be powerful enough to reach beyond the constraints of physical existence.

Still, he could not feel any familiar presence, neither inside the golden pieces of puzzle that were cool and unmoving beneath his fingers nor within the reaches of his mind.

That did not make him doubt, however, it only fuelled his desperate, stubborn resolve. He would find him, no matter what, and then, _then_ — The memories of the thrill of battle, his racing heartbeat as his only worthy rival had pushed him to his limits, consumed his mind again, and all Seto knew for certain was that he would not be able to rest until he had what he wanted.

Victory.

A true fight with a worthy opponent.

_To have their souls clash again in eternal battle._

He did not plan, did not even think, beyond that.

III.

“Kaiba”, Atem said - for Atem was who he was, blinding like a manifestation of shining light now elevated above all earthly ties of mortal flesh and desire. His name came to Seto almost naturally now, as if it would be preposterous to ever think of him as anything else. Atem's tone was firm, but there was a fondness in it Seto could never have emulated from memory alone.

Seto's mind was still clouded, reeling from the rush of ecstasy of their souls finally joined together again on this removed plane of existence. It even drowned out the fatigue that was pulling at him, tugging at his seams. His mere existence here was a battle determined by willpower, by strength of consciousness, and Seto would not lose it - he had never been more certain about anything.

Atem stepped closer to him, and before Seto knew it, he found himself clasping the hand Atem had offered him to help him get up from his knees. He could not get up just yet, but he could hold onto him, overwhelmed by the realness of his presence, in an attempt to steady and anchor himself right here, in this moment, in this place in space and time.

Atem's hands were warm on Seto’s skin as they brushed over his cheeks, his touch appreciating and sure, and there was not only gentleness, but certainty in the way he put his fingers under Seto’s chin to make him look up. Seto had all but forgotten to protest, strangely taken in by the other’s touch that seemed not out of place at all, just a self-evident conclusion to their duel. Still, when Atem bowed down to him, brushing his hair from his forehead to kiss it, Seto had expected it to be unnerving, upsetting even. What he had certainly not expected was that the softness of Atem’s lips and the warmth of his breath on his skin would be so intimate and --familiar.

It resonated within him, tugging right at the ache in his chest that had inevitably pulled him across dimensions to this one soul out of so many.

Seto closed his eyes, and it felt like plunging into darkness, so he forced them open again, clutching Atem’s wrists in fear of slipping away.

“You don’t have to fight, Kaiba”, Atem said, softly. “I will not force you to leave me. But I had to lay my arms down and move on - in the end, you will have to do that, too.”

While working on reassembling the puzzle, Seto had only ever thought about getting here, finding him, and had never considered what would come after. Yet Seto Kaiba would never go back when he could go on instead. 

Atem was wrong, however. The pharaoh had not laid down his sword, but instead had risen to Seto’s challenge without hesitation, and Seto was certain neither of them would ever truly surrender. A calm came over Seto with this certainty, silencing all other aspirations and desires. For once, Seto felt no stirring anger, no desperate need, not even fear. With a sudden clarity, like this was a truth that he had known ever since their first battle, Seto saw it - their souls joined together, clashing and intertwining, before his own lifetime and beyond.

And this time, he would not let Atem leave without him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See notes in the next chapter for my thoughts on what Yami was about to say in the simulation!


	2. Found.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atem's soul has been drifting for too long to find rest easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What if Seto's need to be the one to see Atem off (or as the subs said "put the nail in his coffin") was born not only out of desire for personal closure - what if Seto was indeed what Atem lacked to truly pass on?

Atem had not been truly corporeal in such a long time, he was more familiar with this drifting, lingering presence than being alive, left alone a walking and breathing human being. How could he truly find his eternal rest, tied to two eras as he was? The pharaoh's soul was more than that now, after an existence spanning millennia, it was not easy to move on. He had not passed on when his time had come, when he had sacrificed himself so many lifetimes ago, and now he was not the same as he had been at the time of his death. He was bound to the mind and body of another who was still alive, and even though he left, he remained ever present in the consciousness of his friends, still connected with a time that should have never been his.

After his soul had been out of place for so long, it needed time to settle.

Kaiba found him before that. Atem was not surprised, he had felt the pull of those memories that were still so vivid, so strong, as if he never truly left.

And Atem was ready to grant Kaiba what he was seeking – a final battle, a last goodbye, whatever closure he had denied himself – but he did not expect anything for himself. After all, he had moved on. There was nothing he required anymore.

When the duel was over, when Atem came towards Kaiba kneeling on the stone tiles before him, shaken and still coming undone at the seams but stubbornly persisting in a place he was not supposed to be, Kaiba did not wait for him to speak. Instead, he grabbed his hand and held onto him, clasping it tightly. Atem did not reprimand him, but let him take his hand, responding with a reassuring squeeze. Kaiba had his forehead pressed to his wrist as he held his hand so tightly it hurt, mouthing words that Atem could not make out, yet he did not need to – he had known even before Kaiba had uttered them.

In fact, Atem had always been aware that he would be missed, but his friends had been close to both Yugi _and_ him. As they still had Yugi, it had not hurt them too much to lose the Other Yugi, and that was good. More importantly, Yugi was still whole without him, more so even than when Atem had first met him. It was Atem who was fragmented, even now - his soul was an interlacing puzzle of two existences, of memories that were both connected and conflicting. His identity was fleeting to him, just like his presence - he had not truly lived past his 16th year, and all he had been since then was a soul out of place, living a borrowed life in a borrowed body, no matter how willingly shared. He had been content being a part of Yugi, not his own self. It had been such a relief to not be alone and trapped inside himself anymore. Also it had been easier in many ways, comforting even, to be just Yugi, even though that had never been the truth.

The truth was that Atem did not have one place he belonged to, one name that could encompass all of his existence, the short-lived parts of being after millennia of drifting. Maybe he would never truly find his place. Maybe in-between was where he was meant to be.

But this time, it was not fate and past choices binding him to a present that was not his - it was someone who had been searching for him.

When Atem knelt down to pull Kaiba closer, Kaiba called him neither "Yugi" nor "Atem". He just held his hand, his head now pressed to Atem’s shoulder, as if all he cared about was his tangible, real presence, and them, sharing this moment now.

No matter what name Kaiba had used to address him, Kaiba had never seen him as part of someone else, but always and exclusively as distinctly himself. He had never needed a name or an explanation, Kaiba just needed him, no matter what that entailed, and nothing beyond that. It was as simple as that.

As Atem let his hand rest on Kaiba’s neck to hold him in return, Kaiba trembled ever so slightly under his touch, and the pieces fell finally into place.

Kaiba had come for him, and only him, in all his vast, scattered entirety. It felt good to be held onto like that.

“I know”, Atem heard himself say, “I've been waiting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my mind, what Seto says is something to the extent of "I missed you", also as a continuation of the beginning of the last chapter: Yami was about to voice Seto's feelings, that he misses him, but Seto was not ready yet to admit this to himself. At the end of DSOD, Seto is now finally able to vocalize and accept what was hinted at in the simulation. But those are just my thoughts, I left it intentionally vague, so pick your poison ;>


End file.
